Bill Cosby and his Marker of Pure Evil

Last night, the wife cracked open the “Best of The Cosby Show” DVD I gave her for Christmas. This got me thinking about Picture Pages. For the uninitiated, Picture Pages was a children’s educational segment hosted by Bill Cosby in the 1980s. He had a marker named Mortimer Ichabod Marker that he would use to do connect-the-dots and other puzzles on the pages of a children’s activity book (hence the name of the segment). Curious as to whether this show actually existed or was just a figment of my imagination, I consulted almighty Google. Lo and behold, someone has posted a Picture Pages episode on YouTube.

So Widget1 is sitting next to me, engrossed in his Kindle Fire, and I’m watching the Picture Pages segment and scrolling down to the comments. My eyes land on one particular comment, “I always loved the sound the pencil makes.” A split second later, Mortimer goes to work and makes the noise – a sort of high pitched techno flutter. INSTANTLY, Widget1 pulls his face out of his Kindle and looks at Mortimer…then returns to his Kindle.

A few minutes later, I play the sound effect again. Like a monster to a cookie, Widget1 again looks up at my laptop, which otherwise has no interest for him at the moment. I can only assume that boys are psychologically conditioned to respond to electronic flutters. It might even be genetic. In fact, it MUST be genetic, because it dawns on me now that Mortimer’s sound effect was the only thing I ever actually liked about the show.

Something sinister about it all.

I say thee nay, Mortimer Marker. Go back to the shadow.

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